Becoming Me, Myself and I
By Fiona Wright
Who are you? Do you know what you want to do and what others want you to do? Do you say what you think or what others want you to say? Fiona Wright looks at the challenge of growing up and finding ones true identity.
I always used to think that growing up would never happen and that I'd probably stay about 13or 14 years old forever! Talk about some painful stretching and eyes wide open discoveries! You learn so much stuff at high school that you never actually use again! I did geology for A Level, which is basically the study of rocks...oh dear me. Now I've waved goodbye to teenagedom here's three key things about getting through 'The Wonder Years'.
Accept that no one is normal
As you grow up there's always a huge amount of pressure to be something specific and fit in. People make out that if you are a certain way then you'll be popular, you'll be cool, you'll be 'right'. There's so much of this at school; everyone's searching for their identity and somewhere to belong. Mufti days (non-uniform) were always amazing, everyone dressed to impress and express themselves. The results were certainly colourful, shocking and just plain hilarious. Everyone was stereotyped: goth, skater, chav, tramp, etc. I gave the hippy look a really good bash with tie dyed baggy shirts and braids in my hair. The make up was shocking! Really everyone was trying to be something they weren't – someone they thought would impress or shock. Truth is, growing up we're all geeks; often we don't have a clue, and what we think is cool, most others probably don't. Everyone's unique with different talents and preferences, there's actually no definition of normal, everyone is unique and individual with their own DNA code. Stop trying to clone someone else’s and get on with you own. Be yourself, bring your colourful qualities to the pallet that paints a beautiful masterpiece that is created when everyone brings their true self together.
Surround yourself with great people
The people you fill your life with as a teenager are the ones who shape your world. I had a small group of friends who used to have lunch together, always met by the lockers at break times and pretty much always went via the spar shop on the way home! One day we were feeling a little mischievous and worked out that if we could coax the teacher out of the class room to look at something in the corridor we could run back in and lock her out before she realized there was nothing in the corridor! To say we laughed until our sides split is an understatement. Now, unless you were there you wouldn’t find it all that funny however to my group of friends it was funny and actually the teacher found it quite amusing too! Friends influence your growth as a person and how your character forms. Collect around yourself a great bunch of mates who you can be yourself with, who you can trust and who you can have heaps of fun with. They'll pull you through the rough times and help create the most amazing times. You need great relationships to lead a great life. Don’t panic if one or two slide out of your group – remember everyone is discovering themselves and they may find that they click with a different bunch a little better – plus you may gain a few more from the group next door!
The possibilities are endless
This world is full of so much and just because you might not be amazing at your subjects at school, it doesn't mean you're not good at anything! Just look at YouTube, how many people have been talent spotted in the arts because their talent was put in the right arena? My art teacher never thought I was any good at art. Infact her ‘constructive’ criticism never quite built me up but instead left me feeling a little useless (Don’t worry – I’m over it!), but it did make me determined and I took on board what she said. I kept giving it a go at home and since leaving school I have become the one that people call when they need something creative doing at our local youth centre. Make sure you become someone who can be given ideas without becoming defensive and you'll find there's a whole array of things you are good at and enjoy. You'll find too there will be certain situations where you are the only one with the skill who can do it. Don't think that just because it's hard you can't do it, the fact is your attitude will determine the outcome. If you think you'll fail chances are you probably will. But if you go with the positive mindset that you can do it and will give your best, the results you end up with may surprise you!
For me, I know without God my teenage years would have been a whole lot harder! I had fun as a teenager but I also messed up; God always had my back, he always helped me to get on my feet again (and still does!). He brought me through so many confusing and hard times as a teenager and many times he was all I had to lean on. God's really got the best plan for us and if you choose to go with it I can promise that life will amazing. There'll be tough times sure, but as a teenager you need God, because there's so much that the world offers and it is all within easy reach but it isn’t all good for us. So much can hurt and hold you back in the long run, but knowing God and his heart towards you can change all that. Having a friend like Jesus gives you something much greater to live for and puts into perspective that what you're going through is only part of the journey. The steps still to come are planned to be incredible. Don’t miss out!
Fiona Wright recently moved to Sheffield to enrol on the Leadership Academy for a gap year. She is passionate about young people and lets her creative juices go wild - even as far as building a giant 8 foot Optomus Prime! (A transformer for those that don't know.)