Sports World Review of May 08
Newsround eat your heart out! We’ve rounded up our top 10 stories of the sporting month of May having kept our eyes glued to the sports channels to make sure we can keep you up to date.
No 1 Again!
Manchester United once again win the Premiership Title. Kevin Keegan says it is getting boring and everyone agrees. The only hope for every other club is that Sir Alex Ferguson retires soon but there seems to be no chance of that happening because of his wife Cathy: “That wife of mine just bullies me. She throws me out of the door at seven o'clock every morning! So that's a definite no. Oh no, I dare not risk the wrath of that lass from the Gorbals."
Try and You Will Succeed
Chelsea win the Champion’s League Trophy for the first time in their history prompting Avram Grant to modestly understate his achievement: "I am not 'the Special One'. I'm the normal one. But my wife says I am special..." Where are you now Jose?
Head and Shoulders Above The Rest
Portsmouth win the FA Cup for only the second time in their history. Former England Manager, Graham Taylor, reckons he knows the secret of their success this year: “Most of the Portsmouth team are six foot plus and over."
Management Rewards
David Moyes is unofficially voted the best Premiership Manager, steering Everton to 5th place with the smallest of transfer funds. Club captain Phil Neville sees a great future for the club: “"I think it's fair to say we're an improving team and a team that's getting better." He also thinks his team has taken great strides and is coming on in leaps and bounds.
Down and Out
Derby finish bottom of the Premiership with an embarrassing 11 points from 38 games. Paul Jewell, their manager summarised their achievement succinctly enough: “I've got more points on my driving licence."
Quote of the Month
Kevin Keegan returned to Newcastle United but was realistic about his team’s chances of success: "The only way we will get into Europe is by ferry!"
Childs Play
Manchester United’s Christiano Ronaldo was voted Player of the Year. Many pundits paid tribute to the young Portuguese winger, most notably Chris Waddle: "The one thing he has is pace, quick feet and a great eye for goal." Clearly there is fog on the Tyne.
Ryan Gets One Up on a Legend
Ryan Giggs surpassed Bobby Chalton’s record number of appearances for Manchester United which is clearly a result of his perfectionist attitude. Following United’s 2-0 win over Fulham the Welsh Wizard remarked: “We are happy with the three points, but it could have been more." Weren’t they the annoying kids at school who sat at the front? They could always colour between the lines!
D’oh! Nut Again!
Cesc Fabregas won nothing this year which seems to be due to his secret obsession for doughnuts: "Sometimes on a day off I go to the doughnut shop. When we play at home, I go there after the game and it's like a doughnut party! Everyone is eating doughnuts inside their cars - it's like a disco!" Who has ever been to a doughnut party?
Humble Shyness Personified
England’s new manager Fabio Cappello appointed a new captain, Rio Ferdinand who was awarded the role because of his fine command of the English language. Asked to explain the captaincy situation at Manchester United he eloquently cleared up any misunderstanding: “Gary Neville is the club captain but has been injured for the best part of a year now - and Giggsy's taken on the mantelpiece." What a beautiful game!